An Apple and a Screwdriver

"What happened to the funny shit?"

"What do you mean?"

"Everything you write lately is a fucking drag."

"Who says 'drag'?"

Kevin laughs. "I do, I guess."

We're sitting on the tailgate of his truck in the Home Depot parking lot eating breakfast. It's hot and humid and only a little past nine and I'll be sunburned by the end of the day and I'll drink a case of Ice barely before I get out of the shower later, collapse in the air conditioning and think of how much bed space I don't need anymore, but I damn well enjoy. For now I'm eating an apple and drinking one of two screwdrivers I packed and I think that maybe vodka on a hot day wasn't my best idea. 

"You're hair is fucking huge right now," he says between bites. 

"I know. I keep thinking I'll just shave it."

"I mean, normally, I'd be like 'don't'. Chicks dig long hair, but damn, that's not long, it's... sprawling."

I laugh and take one of the last bites of my apple, wash it down. 

"Seriously though, shave it." 

The sun has already burned the clouds from the sky and a thick haze hangs in the air and I'm not sure if it's the great villain of the 80's and 90's "pollution", or if it's just fucking hot and I was buzzed. Either way I had no interest in work. 

"Let's just blow it off," I say.

"What?"

"Work. Let's just make something up. Go to the bar. Get enchiladas somewhere."

"Are you trying to date me?"

"Maybe I am."

"Besides, who eats enchiladas at fucking nine in the morning?"

"Well, obviously they're for lunch, I just mean, let's do literally anything else." I laid back in the bed, took the last bite of the apple and threw it across the parking lot. I heard it land.

"Missed," Kevin said.

"Missed what?"

"Shopping cart. It was close though."

"Story of my life."

I hear Kevin put his trash in his paper bag. "You almost ready?" he asks.

"No."

"We'll call off tomorrow," he said, keeping with tradition. 

I sat up, finished the first screwdriver and wiped my mouth. "All right." we got off the tailgate, shut it. I threw the empty bottle in a trash can and climbed into the truck. On the bright side, I'd have wind in my face in a moment and I'd be daydreaming and through the day, between jobs, I would have the wind in my face and I'd be daydreaming and that would be okay.